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asandir
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Unread postby asandir » 31 Oct 2007, 23:29

one reason I got married :D
Brown rules out Simpsons cameo

Britain's Prime Minister Gordon Brown has ruled out making a cameo appearance in the hit US television cartoon series The Simpsons.

Mr Brown's predecessor Tony Blair voiced a yellow cartoon version of himself in a 2003 episode of the show entitled "The Regina Monologues".

But Mr Brown has vowed there will be no repeat.

"I think Tony Blair did that, I don't think that is for me," he told GMTV television, insisting he would also not appear on a music talent contest or ballroom dancing shows.

In "The Regina Monologues", the Simpson family travelled to London and were greeted by Mr Blair. Dim-witted dad Homer Simpson mistook him for the fictional bumbling eccentric Mr Bean.
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Unread postby Pol » 04 Nov 2007, 15:17

Super mouse runners.So do you think that is not possible to eat twice time more, being still in move, never been exhausted, and having kids after 80-ty with guaranteed longevity?

It is, if you would be mouse with PEPCK-C enzyme. :D
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Unread postby Veldrynus » 04 Nov 2007, 16:36

ThunderTitan wrote:
Yeah, and women complain all the time, that they are the unlucky ones because they have to give birth.
Veldryn 15:15 And Vel found a dirty old jawbone of a walrus and put forth his hand, and took it, and in his unholy rage, he slew thirty four thousand men and children therewith.

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Unread postby Omega_Destroyer » 04 Nov 2007, 17:10

Well, it's not like there's much living for when the gear stops working. ;)
And the chickens. Those damn chickens.

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Veldrynus
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Unread postby Veldrynus » 04 Nov 2007, 17:20

Of course, there is!

Like... fishing... and gardening....
Veldryn 15:15 And Vel found a dirty old jawbone of a walrus and put forth his hand, and took it, and in his unholy rage, he slew thirty four thousand men and children therewith.

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Unread postby asandir » 05 Nov 2007, 01:40

sounds .... great ....
Historian reveals medieval sausage recipe

A hobby historian has discovered the oldest known recipe for German sausage, a list of ingredients for Thuringian bratwurst nearly 600 years old.

According to the 1432 guidelines, Thuringian sausage-makers had to use only the purest, unspoiled meat and were threatened with a fine of 24 pfennigs - a day's wages - if they did not, a spokesman for the German Bratwurst Museum said.

Medieval town markets in Germany had committees charged with monitoring the quality of produce.

Thuringian bratwursts, which are made of beef and pork, are symbols of Germany's cultural heritage and ubiquitous snacks at football matches.

Historian Hubert Erzmann, 75, found the ancient recipe, inscribed with pen and ink in a heavy tome of parchment, earlier this year while doing research in an archive in the eastern town of Weimar, museum spokesman Thomas Maeuer said.

"The discovery shows that there were already consumer protection laws in the Middle Ages," he said.
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Unread postby Elvin » 05 Nov 2007, 12:07

Imagine that :D
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Unread postby Veldrynus » 05 Nov 2007, 13:20

Well, we can only guess what "pure" and "unspoiled" exactly meant back then.
Veldryn 15:15 And Vel found a dirty old jawbone of a walrus and put forth his hand, and took it, and in his unholy rage, he slew thirty four thousand men and children therewith.

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Unread postby ThunderTitan » 05 Nov 2007, 17:36

No one crapped in it...



Finally someone is doing something to protect those poor innocent bicycles against mental and physical harm:
Man Put on Sex Offenders List After Trying to Have Sex with a Bicycle

First of all, how do you have sex with a bicycle?

Robert Stewart was at the Aberley House Hostel in Ayr, south west Scotland, in October of last year, when two housekeepers entered his room, to find him, er, engaged with the bicycle.

They had knocked several times, but had not received an answer so, thinking the room empty, they used the master key to enter.

Deputy fiscal Gail Davidson said, “They then observed the accused wearing only a white T-shirt, naked from the waist down. The accused was holding the bike and moving his hips back and forth as if to simulate sex.”

Stewart was placed on the sex offenders’ list but his sentence was deferred until next month.

My questions are: was the bicycle of legal age? Did it consent? And did anyone get this on video?
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Unread postby Elvin » 05 Nov 2007, 18:07

Corrupted bastard! Violating bicycles what's next? :D
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Unread postby Veldrynus » 05 Nov 2007, 18:13

Can you prove the bicycle didn't wanted the guy make love to it?

Yeah, love can be blind sometimes.
Veldryn 15:15 And Vel found a dirty old jawbone of a walrus and put forth his hand, and took it, and in his unholy rage, he slew thirty four thousand men and children therewith.

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Unread postby ThunderTitan » 05 Nov 2007, 19:15

Who cares what the bike wanted?! It was obviously underaged.

Also, anyone from Texas? I heard that over there you get on the sex offenders list if anyone sees you doing it even in your own home in any other position then missionary... :loll:
Oregon Town's Lawn Gnomes End Up at Police Station After Prank

SPRINGFIELD, Ore. — A number of gnomes and other creatures have taken sanctuary at the Springfield police station.

As part of a prank, somebody stole 75 lawn ornaments from around town and placed them meticulously on and around the lawn of one house on Oct. 17, police said.

Among the figurines are plastic and porcelain geese, deer, frogs are gnomes.

Police took them back to the station to help find the rightful owners.

"We need to get them out of here," Capt. Richard Harrison said. "Every time I leave my office they're sitting in my chair, working on my computer. I can't seem to get rid of the darn things."

The figurines will be put out for public viewing on Tuesday.

"If they come here and they can identify it we're more than happy to let the gnome go home," Harrison said.

Figurines that aren't claimed will be sold at auction.
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Unread postby asandir » 06 Nov 2007, 01:14

Canine film legends recognised

Famous dogs including Lassie and Oscar-winning animated pooch Gromit were inducted into the world's first canine Walk of Fame overnight.

Other top hounds included Fang from the Harry Potter films and Toto from The Wizard of Oz.

"Dogs play a very important role in our lives, through their companionship, unconditional love and rewarding relationship they give us," said Caroline Kisko of the Kennel Club.

"It is fantastic to see that this is felt the world over through the recognition given by the film industry, and the number of these films that are box office hits prove how much love the public have for dogs in general."

The Walk of Fame is located near the famous Battersea Dogs Home in south-west London.

The six inductees, who also included Bobby from Greyfriars Bobby: The True Story Of A Dog, Bullseye from Oliver! and Chance and Shadow from the Homeward Bound films, were chosen from a short-list of 15.

Those left out in the top dog stakes included Pongo and Perdita from 101 Dalmatians, Hooch from Turner and Hooch and the four-legged stars of Lady and the Tramp.

Tintin's sidekick Snowy also failed to make the cut.
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Unread postby asandir » 07 Nov 2007, 03:02

Die and you're under arrest! Britain's stupidest laws revealed

Queen Elizabeth II's speech in the British Parliament overnight may have been routine, but at least nobody got bored to death. That would have been against the law.

Dying in Parliament is an offence and is also by far the most absurd law in Britain, according to a survey of nearly 4,000 people by a television channel showing a legal drama series.

And though the lords were clad in their red and white cloaks and ambassadors from around the world wore colourful national costumes, at least nobody turned up in a suit of armour. Illegal.

Other rules deemed utterly stupid included one that permits a pregnant woman to urinate in a policeman's hat and and another that says it is OK to murder bow-and-arrow-carrying Scotsmen within the city walls of York, northern England.

A law stating that in Liverpool, only a clerk in a tropical fish store is allowed to be publicly topless, was also ridiculous, said a poll of 3,931 people for UKTV Gold television.

Nearly half of those surveyed admitted to breaking the ban on eating mince pies on Christmas Day, which dates back to the 17th century and was originally designed to outlaw gluttony during the rule of the Puritan Oliver Cromwell.

The laws and other regulations were culled from published research into ancient legislation that has never been repealed although subsequent statutes have rendered them obsolete.

Respondents were given a shortlist and asked to vote.


Most ridiculous British laws

1. It is illegal to die in the Houses of Parliament (27 per cent)

2. It is an act of treason to place a postage stamp bearing the British monarch upside down (7 per cent)

3. In Liverpool, it is illegal for a woman to be topless except as a clerk in a tropical fish store (6 per cent)

4. Mince pies cannot be eaten on Christmas Day (5 per cent)

5. In Scotland, if someone knocks on your door and requires the use of your toilet, you must let them enter (3 per cent)

6. A pregnant woman can legally relieve herself anywhere she wants, including in a policeman's helmet (4 per cent)

7. The head of any dead whale found on the British coast automatically becomes the property of the king, and the tail belongs to the queen (3.5 percent)

8. It is illegal to avoid telling the tax man anything you do not want him to know, but legal not to tell him information you do not mind him knowing (3 per cent)

9. It is illegal to enter the Houses of Parliament in a suit of armour (3 per cent)

10. In the city of York it is legal to murder a Scotsman within the ancient city walls, but only if he is carrying a bow and arrow (2 per cent)
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Unread postby Omega_Destroyer » 07 Nov 2007, 04:10

3. In Liverpool, it is illegal for a woman to be topless except as a clerk in a tropical fish store (6 per cent)
I wonder how on earth Parliment came up with that law.

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Unread postby asandir » 07 Nov 2007, 04:27

that law should so be expanded, re-written even to have a "not" put in a pertinent place
Ugandan boxer fights on despite blindness

It's an amateur boxing practice with a difference: neither fighter can see.

In the red corner: Robert Sembooze, 28, blindfolded. In the blue: Bashir Ramadan, 38, who doesn't need a blindfold because he lost his sight 12 years ago.

The two Ugandans in padded gloves dance like fireflies on the concrete floor of the East Coast Boxing Club and punch each other in the head and chest.

Uganda's blind boxer, little known even in his home country, does not think being sightless is the handicap some might expect.

"I don't consider it a big problem," said Ramadan, who has to tap his way into Kampala's popular fight club with a stick, as he wiped down after the half-hour punch-up.

"You get used to boxing in the dark."

He admitted being able to see your opponent is a core feature of the sport - and he has written off his dream of being a champion - but he is determined not to quit.

"When the doctor said I was going blind, I thought: I will have to stop boxing," Ramadan said. "Then I thought: why not carry on? It was tough at first, but then it got easier."

Ramadan is one of nearly seven million Africans - 1 per cent of the continent's population - who are blind, according to British charity Sight Savers.

Blindness has many causes but 80 per cent of cases in Africa are curable or preventable. Easy-to-remove cataracts are left to cloud the eyes of those unable to afford treatment. Curable trachomas are left to fester.

For Ramadan's opponent, Sembooze, a blind fight can be the making of a training session. "He's a good boxer," he said, out of breath as he left the ring. "A lot of people could learn from him."

'Keep trying'

Ramadan's sight started deteriorating in 1995. He went to an eye specialist who said he had a damaged vein behind his eye, which in turn had killed the nerves.

He said the injury had nothing to do with boxing but in any case it was too late to treat it - blindness was inevitable. Defiant, he continued his training.

"My message is: keep trying, things can work," he said.

Boxing has a long history in Uganda, a small east African country flanked by the twin forks of the Great Rift Valley and bisected by the Nile as it rises out of Lake Victoria.

Former colonial power Britain encouraged the sport to make its forces more fearsome and dictator Idi Amin was a boxing champion when he served as a colonial army officer.

More recent big-hitters include John "The Beast" Mugabi, a frightening middleweight in the early 1980s, and Kassim Ouma, Uganda's 2004 junior middleweight champion.

Ouma was born into poverty and forcibly recruited as a child soldier in the then-rebel National Resistance Movement of current President Yoweri Museveni. His ascent is a rags-to-riches story many Ugandans would like to emulate.

'Sense' the opponent

Like his Ugandan heroes, Ramadan wants to compete in international boxing, but is frustrated by few opportunities.

"I'd love to start blind boxing as a sport but I know of no others like me. There is athletics, javelin, even wrestling for blind people. Why not boxing?" he said.

Set against one of Kampala's burgeoning slums, where iron-roof shacks compete for space with spidery banana trees, the East Coast Boxing Club attracts many unemployed youths.

Twin brothers Hussein and Hassan Khalil opened the club, partly to continue their passion for boxing after throwing in their own towels. Both boxed professionally.

Hussein won the Commonwealth, African and Kings Cup lightweight titles for Kenya in 1983. He trained in Denmark and Germany before moving back to his native Uganda in 1993.

Revisiting the poverty of Kampala's slums, he came up with the club as a way of giving school drop-outs a new dream.

"There are problems in this area. Kids can't pay school fees, they have no opportunities. We wanted them to do this instead of getting into drugs," he said.

Hussein first noticed Ramadan's blindness at practices. He would ask him to put on gloves and Ramadan would fumble around, then pick two from different pairs. "But it impressed me so much, the progress he made since," he said.

For Hussein, blindfolding Ramadan's opponents achieves more than empathy with his plight. It is a core part of training, helping his boxers focus other senses besides vision.

"Without eyes, you learn to sense your opponent is there," he said.
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Unread postby Ceres » 07 Nov 2007, 06:01

Wow, I've seen a movie of that. Fighting blind.
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Unread postby asandir » 07 Nov 2007, 06:37

Last word on typewriter not written yet

Paul Schweitzer is one of a dying breed. As owner of Gramercy Typewriter Co in New York City, he repairs machines that many consider obsolete.

"The younger generation says, 'Who needs typewriters?'," said Mr Schweitzer, 68, who joined his father's business in 1959. "It's not true; there are people who still like hitting the keys."

Some organisations still use typewriters to write labels or fill forms. And there's always the person who just prefers to type the old fashioned way.

"Some things you can't do with a computer," said Steve Primont, owner of TTI Business Systems Inc, a supplier in New York. "We just sold 15 typewriters to a major law firm."

The typewriter industry may not be dead yet, but it has been in decline since long before the rise of the MySpace generation.

They are "a minuscule part of our business," said Tom Keirnan, owner of Professional Business Machines, an office equipment service company in New York. "We'll maybe sell a dozen electric typewriters a year, maybe two dozen."

At Gramercy, typewriters account for 25 per cent of its business, the rest coming from servicing Hewlett Packard laser printers and fax machines.

"That's what pays the bills, not selling a ribbon for $10," Mr Schweitzer said.


IBM Selectric

The typewriter was first patented in 1868, and marketed and sold by the Remington gun company in 1874.

They gained popularity in the early 20th century, with production peaking in the mid-1970s. In the 1980s, word processors - typewriters with a memory card - had a relatively brief run until they were eclipsed by personal computers with word-processing software.

IBM was the giant of the US typewriter market. In 1975, its Selectric typewriter accounted for about 75 per cent of the market in the United States. Demand started to wane in the 1980s, and the company produced its last typewriter, the Wheelwriter, in 1993.

Smith Corona, which employed 5,000 people during the early 1970s, struggled to make a profit in the 1990s. The company filed a second Chapter 11 - the reorganisation provision of bankruptcy law - before it was sold to Pubco Corp, a Cleveland-based printer maker, in 2001. Pubco uses the name to market printer supplies.

The Royal Typewriter Company, founded in 1904, was another leader in the industry. Now the company is called Royal Consumer Information Products Inc, and sells office supplies like printers, faxes and copiers, as well as Royal typewriters manufactured overseas.

Japan's Brother Industries Ltd still makes typewriters, but sales are steadily decreasing, said Joyce Brittingham, a spokeswoman for the company's US division in Bridgewater, New Jersey.


Collectors

Though sales on newer machines are declining, antique typewriters have a following among collectors, including actor Tom Hanks who lists "old manual typewriters" as a hobby on his MySpace page.

Chuck Dilts, 43, an editor of ETCetera, the Journal of the Early Typewriter Collectors' Association, estimates there are about 600 serious collectors in the United States.

Mr Dilts and a partner run a typewriter museum in Southboro, Massachusetts, which features about 800 models.

Collectors generally look for typewriters made before 1920, when the machines became more standardised, Mr Dilts said.

"For me, chasing them down is a lot more fun than actually getting them," he said.

There is practically no collector interest in typewriters built after 1956, when they became electric.

"There something about typewriters, where when you're writing a poem or story and you have the clickety-clack on your fingers," said Deborah Chapman, a customer at Gramercy Typewriter Co. "I'm a clickety-clack girl."

MyTypewriter.com lists 56 authors, living and dead, and their favorite typewriters. John Irving uses an IBM Selectric. John Updike favors a 1940s Olivetti and Joan Didion writes with a Royal KMM.

Gramercy's two-room office in Manhattan is cluttered with typewriters, some antique and some electric. Paul Schweitzer's workbench is piled with inky screwdrivers and other tools. He hires assistants to help him fix printers.

Retirement isn't an option, he said, because he's the only one who can repair a typewriter.

"Who's going to fix the typewriters?" he asked while installing in a new ribbon in a Smith Corona from the mid-'70s. "I'm going until I drop."
Human madness is the howl of a child with a shattered heart.

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Unread postby Ceres » 08 Nov 2007, 05:07

I remember this guy over here at work. He is still a fan of typewriters.
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Unread postby asandir » 08 Nov 2007, 05:25

weird :)

this isn't gonna make the italians happy!
German steeple takes Pisa's leaning tower title

The Guinness Book of World Records has ruled that a church steeple in Germany, not the famous leaning tower of Pisa, is the most tilted tower in the world.

The 25.7 metre steeple tilts at an angle of 5.07 degrees, while the tower of Pisa tilts at just 3.97 degrees, Guinness German edition spokesman Olaf Kuchenbecker said.

"When you lay photos of the two next to each other you can see it relatively clearly," he said.

The new record, scheduled to appear next autumn in the 2009 edition of the Guinness Book of World Records, could strip the Pisa tower of its iconic status, Mr Kuchenbecker said.

The 15th century German church tower stands in Suurhusen, a small village near Emden in north-west Germany.

Although its tilt angle is greater than Pisa's tower, it is less than half its height and has none of its ornate beauty.

Mr Kuchenbecker will present the village with a certificate commemorating the record.
Human madness is the howl of a child with a shattered heart.


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