Need help with transition texts for GrayFace MM7 Patch.

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GrayFace
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Need help with transition texts for GrayFace MM7 Patch.

Unread postby GrayFace » 09 Dec 2016, 00:44

GrayFace MM7 Patch v2.1 will have archives with optional changes to the game, one of which is addition of transition animations for Nighon Tunnels and Tunnels to Eofol. MM7 contains movies for these transitions, but no text. I need your help in making these texts. Nighon Tunnels transition happens when you go from Stone City or Thunderfist Mountain into Nighon Tunnels. Tunnels to Eofol transition happens when you go from Thunderfist Mountain to Tunnels to Eofol.
My patches: MM6 MM7 MM8. MMExtension. Tools. Also, I love Knytt Stories and Knytt Underground. I'm also known as sergroj.

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Anubis
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Re: Need help with transition texts for GrayFace MM7 Patch.

Unread postby Anubis » 11 Dec 2016, 10:05

Is this the sort of transition text you're looking for?

Stone City/Thunderfist Mountain > Nighon Tunnels

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Excavated by the dwarves and later magically warded by the warlocks, the Nighon Tunnels became a major trade route as well as the foundation for solidifying an alliance between the two races. Despite the trouble with the gog, common in these tunnels, both the dwarves and the warlocks continue to fight them back in order to keep the trade thriving.

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Re: Need help with transition texts for GrayFace MM7 Patch.

Unread postby Anubis » 11 Dec 2016, 11:10

Here's one for Thunderfist Mountain/Land of the Giants > Tunnels to Eeofol:

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Since the coming of the Kreegan and the establishment of a colony in the Land of the Giants, the Kreegan immediately began a massive operation to infest these tunnels with savage behemoths and medusas. With abominations now lurking in these tunnels, no army dares enter without sustaining massive losses in order to end the threat of the Kreegan. 
'Not sure what the plural of medusa in mythology is. Medusas? Medusae? Either way, I hope both these transition texts are satisfactory enough. Feel free to edit them as you will.

Tl;dr version: I originally had the sentence as "Since the coming of the Kreegan and the conquering of Eeofol," but I'm unfamiliar with the lore of Might & Magic as I've only played VI to X. I read somewhere that Eeofol was a lush land before it was conquered by the Kreegan, but I was wondering if the "Land of the Giants" was just a small area of the whole of Eeofol...Because it seems that if the Kreegan did conquer Eeofol, the titans there would have attacked the Kreegan and stomped the hell (pardon the pun) out of their colony.

:)

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Re: Need help with transition texts for GrayFace MM7 Patch.

Unread postby Macros the Black » 11 Dec 2016, 17:09

'Not sure what the plural of medusa in mythology is. Medusas? Medusae? Either way, I hope both these transition texts are satisfactory enough. Feel free to edit them as you will.
It doesn't have a plural. Medusa was a name, not a species. She was one of the gorgons, but obviously that's something else in Might and Magic lore. The Heroes games or Might a Magic 7 probably does mention their plural somewhere, and I'm guessing it's "medusa's" but I'm not 100% sure on that.
Last edited by Macros the Black on 11 Dec 2016, 17:16, edited 6 times in total.
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Re: Need help with transition texts for GrayFace MM7 Patch.

Unread postby GrayFace » 11 Dec 2016, 17:35

Thanks! Well, I was having less concrete texts in mind, like

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These caves are the traditional hideout of goblins and bandits.  Whatever lives there now doesn't make the place smell too good…

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A huge, magical maze stretches before you as far as the eye can see.  Looking at it for long dazzles the eyes and confuses the mind.

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Overgrown and weather beaten, the Grand Temple of the Sun has seen better days.  It appears someone is still taking care of the place.
There of cause are standard transitions that do read like back story, but here description from party perspective with limited back story would fit better I think. They also have to be fully accurate, not adding anything to the lore. Are yours? Also, the text for Tunnels to Eofol speaks more about Eofol itself than the tunnels.
Last edited by GrayFace on 11 Dec 2016, 17:36, edited 1 time in total.
My patches: MM6 MM7 MM8. MMExtension. Tools. Also, I love Knytt Stories and Knytt Underground. I'm also known as sergroj.

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Anubis
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Re: Need help with transition texts for GrayFace MM7 Patch.

Unread postby Anubis » 11 Dec 2016, 22:42

Gotcha. Scrap my texts, then. It's been a while since I've seen the transition texts, lol. I'm quite busy right now so I'll make another attempt later tonight or tomorrow.

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Re: Need help with transition texts for GrayFace MM7 Patch.

Unread postby GrayFace » 12 Dec 2016, 02:41

I think it would make sense to say how vast and dangerous the system of tunnels is when entering Nighon Tunnels.
My patches: MM6 MM7 MM8. MMExtension. Tools. Also, I love Knytt Stories and Knytt Underground. I'm also known as sergroj.

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Re: Need help with transition texts for GrayFace MM7 Patch.

Unread postby Anubis » 14 Dec 2016, 11:30

I apologize for the delay as this week is finals week. Here's my second attempt:

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Upon seeing the vast network of tunnels, your instinct tells you that danger is just around the corner. You vow to remain vigilant.

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As you approach the entrance, a thunderous howl pierces your ears, provoking a feeling of dread. You immediately steel yourself for the trials to come.
I'm still not sure if this is what you're looking for, as these texts establish 'feelings' in your party. I'm not sure if any transition texts in MM6-MM8 have done this. Also, I'm not sure if you want auditory aspects (e.g. thunderous howl) as the Behemoths don't have that sound effect in-game.
Last edited by Anubis on 14 Dec 2016, 11:49, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Need help with transition texts for GrayFace MM7 Patch.

Unread postby Anubis » 18 Dec 2016, 03:45

@ GrayFace - Finals week is over with. If you don't really care for the texts I submitted and would like me to give another go at it, let me know. I'm always happy to try to help, what with me being a huge fan of this series. :)

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Re: Need help with transition texts for GrayFace MM7 Patch.

Unread postby GrayFace » 18 Dec 2016, 11:07

Thank you! I like these. In Nighon Tunnels though the real danger starts when you enter Thunderfist Mountain, not around the corner.
My thinking about it goes like this ATM: "This vast network of tunnels ..., but also became a home for many dangerous creatures", but that's just my unfinished take.
[edit] Or maybe "This vast network of tunnels connects Stone City with Nighon, but also exposes it to many dangerous creatures".
Transitions dealing with feelings are rear indeed, but here's one from MM7:

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A frightening spectacle of shadowy claws and twisted demonic figures beckons you inside.  You can hear a woman singing in the distance, but can't quite make out the words.
Maybe the 2nd sentence in Eofol transition is too emotional. I think I'll leave just the 1st one.
Last edited by GrayFace on 20 Dec 2016, 18:43, edited 4 times in total.
My patches: MM6 MM7 MM8. MMExtension. Tools. Also, I love Knytt Stories and Knytt Underground. I'm also known as sergroj.

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Re: Need help with transition texts for GrayFace MM7 Patch.

Unread postby Anubis » 22 Dec 2016, 00:33

Third attempt!

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Upon seeing the vast network of tunnels connecting Stone City with Nighon, your instinct tells you that many dangerous creatures dwell within. You vow to remain vigilant.

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As you approach the entrance, a thunderous howl pierces your ears, provoking a feeling of dread. Whatever produced that sound is drawing near, with each step rocking the earth beneath your feet.
Last edited by Anubis on 22 Dec 2016, 01:18, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Need help with transition texts for GrayFace MM7 Patch.

Unread postby GrayFace » 06 Jan 2017, 19:11

Thank you! I modified them a little:

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As you go deeper into this vast network of tunnels, your instinct tells you that many dangerous creatures dwell within. You vow to remain vigilant.

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A thunderous howl pierces your ears, provoking a feeling of dread. Whatever produced that sound is drawing near, with each step rocking the earth beneath your feet.
(removed the bit about entrance, because they may not be a clear entrance going from tunnel to tunnel)
I'll go with these or with your corrections as I might have messed something up in terms of expressiveness/sounding good, I'm not a native speaker.
Last edited by GrayFace on 06 Jan 2017, 19:16, edited 3 times in total.
My patches: MM6 MM7 MM8. MMExtension. Tools. Also, I love Knytt Stories and Knytt Underground. I'm also known as sergroj.

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GrayFace
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Re: Need help with transition texts for GrayFace MM7 Patch.

Unread postby GrayFace » 06 Jan 2017, 19:20

With screenshots: Nighon:
Image
Eofol:
Image
My patches: MM6 MM7 MM8. MMExtension. Tools. Also, I love Knytt Stories and Knytt Underground. I'm also known as sergroj.

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Re: Need help with transition texts for GrayFace MM7 Patch.

Unread postby Anubis » 06 Jan 2017, 22:44

Your modifications are perfect! I love these texts!

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Re: Need help with transition texts for GrayFace MM7 Patch.

Unread postby GrayFace » 07 Jan 2017, 08:47

Great! Me too, thanks again for them :)
My patches: MM6 MM7 MM8. MMExtension. Tools. Also, I love Knytt Stories and Knytt Underground. I'm also known as sergroj.

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Re: Need help with transition texts for GrayFace MM7 Patch.

Unread postby GrayFace » 19 May 2017, 03:54

I moved the transition from Stone City/Nighon Tunnels border to Nighon Tunnels/Thunderfist Mountain border. It still makes perfect sense.
For the transition back to the Stone City I made a different simple text:

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This tunnel leads to the Stone City.
My patches: MM6 MM7 MM8. MMExtension. Tools. Also, I love Knytt Stories and Knytt Underground. I'm also known as sergroj.

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Re: Need help with transition texts for GrayFace MM7 Patch.

Unread postby Anubis » 20 May 2017, 13:23

That's a pretty good idea on the transition move. Also, not to sound nitpicky, but are you sure it's not supposed to be:

"This tunnel leads to Stone City."

I dunno. I guess it would depend on how the citizens of...whatever world MM7 is...refer to Stone City/the Stone City. :D
Last edited by Anubis on 20 May 2017, 13:26, edited 2 times in total.

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Re: Need help with transition texts for GrayFace MM7 Patch.

Unread postby GrayFace » 21 May 2017, 14:12

Thanks, removed "the". You should be nitpicky, I want to make these texts as refined as possible :)
My patches: MM6 MM7 MM8. MMExtension. Tools. Also, I love Knytt Stories and Knytt Underground. I'm also known as sergroj.


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