Bizarre News

Light-hearted discussions, forum games and anything that doesn't fit into the other forums.

Moderators: Moderators, Celestial Heavens Staff

User avatar
Kalah
Site Admin
Site Admin
Posts: 20015
Joined: 24 Nov 2005

Postby Kalah » Feb 10 2006, 23:24

Toronto Police Face Bizarre Scene

In what was considered nothing more than a common domestic disturbance call, Toronto police were baffled when they entered the suburban home of a 33 year old man today. Inside was the house owner, tied to his ceiling fan wearing nothing but a tutu, and with 42 dollar bills stuffed down his throat - the reason he had not been able to call for help himself. It was only the vigilance of concerned neighbours, hearing sharp cries some time earlier, which saw the arrival of the police.

Sources say the victim had also suffered several blows to his rear quarters with a blunt object, but as yet it is not clear what object. When reporters asked if the police has any suspects, they said the only description the terrified victim had been able to give of his assailant was something describing "a bat".

Detectives have very little to go on in this strange crime, as it seems more like a personal vendetta than a robbery; the man was apparently attacked in his own home, forced to undress, spanked and then tied to a spinning ceiling fan - a strange ritual indeed. Authorities have not issued any warnings to the public as yet, as they have no indications this was anything more than a one-time assault. They still encourage people in the area to be careful letting strangers into their homes.

- The Toronto Star, february 11th.
In War: Resolution, In Defeat: Defiance, In Victory: Magnanimity, In Peace: Goodwill.

User avatar
ThunderTitan
Perpetual Poster
Perpetual Poster
Posts: 23263
Joined: 06 Jan 2006
Location: Now/here
Contact:

Postby ThunderTitan » Feb 11 2006, 0:23

OMG Batman is loose in Canada. :lol:
Disclaimer: May contain sarcasm!
I have never faked a sarcasm in my entire life. - ???
"With ABC deleting dynamite gags from cartoons, do you find that your children are using explosives less frequently?" — Mark LoPresti

Alt-0128: €

Image

User avatar
Mutare Drake
Scout
Scout
Posts: 178
Joined: 07 Jan 2006

Postby Mutare Drake » Feb 11 2006, 3:41

Orfinn wrote:Yeat again if this is true, america have really fallen far :rolleyes:

Yeah, it's been going down the tubes for years now. Look at our president. For some entertainment, anyone ever read any Bushisms? Here's a nice one..."You're free. And freedom is beautiful. And, you know, it'll take time to restore chaos and order--order out of chaos. But we will." Yup, and he's doing a good job... :disagree:

IRT Kalah's news story
Wow that's creepy. Evil Batman is out, careful everyone.

User avatar
DaemianLucifer
Round Table Hero
Round Table Hero
Posts: 11282
Joined: 06 Jan 2006
Location: City 17

Postby DaemianLucifer » Feb 11 2006, 11:50

@Kalah

Now thats kinky!Someones been playing too much dungeon in the beta.Or watched the catwoman movie one times too many.

User avatar
ThunderTitan
Perpetual Poster
Perpetual Poster
Posts: 23263
Joined: 06 Jan 2006
Location: Now/here
Contact:

Postby ThunderTitan » Feb 11 2006, 23:00

Doesn't really qualify as news, but i didn't want to start a new thread just for this!

Why video games are bad for you: People like this!
Disclaimer: May contain sarcasm!

I have never faked a sarcasm in my entire life. - ???
"With ABC deleting dynamite gags from cartoons, do you find that your children are using explosives less frequently?" — Mark LoPresti

Alt-0128: €


Image

User avatar
Gaidal Cain
Round Table Hero
Round Table Hero
Posts: 6972
Joined: 26 Nov 2005
Location: Solna

Postby Gaidal Cain » Feb 12 2006, 8:30

:| Someone takes his gaming a bit too seriously. "Fega jävel"...
You don't want to make enemies in Nuclear Engineering. -- T. Pratchett

User avatar
Orfinn
Round Table Hero
Round Table Hero
Posts: 3325
Joined: 06 Jan 2006
Location: Norway

Postby Orfinn » Feb 12 2006, 11:18

Gaidal Cain wrote:"Fega jävel"...

Which means Feige Jævel or shall we say sissy devil :D

User avatar
LordHoborgXVII
Scout
Scout
Posts: 190
Joined: 03 Feb 2006
Location: USA

Postby LordHoborgXVII » Feb 12 2006, 20:01

Was he just playing Legends of Might and Magic?;) Oh dear me!:scared:
Happy Millenium!

User avatar
Gaidal Cain
Round Table Hero
Round Table Hero
Posts: 6972
Joined: 26 Nov 2005
Location: Solna

Postby Gaidal Cain » Feb 12 2006, 20:43

Not unless people have started to spell it "Counterstrike" as of late...
You don't want to make enemies in Nuclear Engineering. -- T. Pratchett

User avatar
DaemianLucifer
Round Table Hero
Round Table Hero
Posts: 11282
Joined: 06 Jan 2006
Location: City 17

Postby DaemianLucifer » Feb 14 2006, 19:51

Not actually news,more of a facts.But still,quite bizzare.And funny :devil:

Bizzare facts of our world

In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female.
Having sexual relations with a male animal are punishable by death. (like THAT makes sense)

***
In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking
directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in the mirror.

***
Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers;
the sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.
(a brick!??)

***
The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation.

***
There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins,
who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time... Reason: under Guam law, it is
expressly forbiden for virgins to marry. (Let's just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere
else in the world that even comes close to this? And with that as the job, what could they give
you for fringe benefits?)

***
In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do
so with her bare hands. The husband's lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.
(Ah! Justice!)

***
Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England - but only in tropical fish stores. (But of course)

***
In Cali, Columbia, a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time it happens, her
mother must be in the room to witness the act. (Makes one shudder at the thought.)

***
In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.
(I presume this was a big enough problem that they had to pass this law?)

***
In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exeption: prophylactics
may be dispensed from a vending machine only "in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for
consumption on the premises." (Is this a great country or what? Not as great as Guam!)

***
If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to
heat one cup of coffee. (Hardly seems worth it)

***
If you fart consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy
of an atomic bomb. (Now that's more like it)

***
A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes. (In my next life I want to be a pig)

***
Some lions mate over 50 times a day. (In my next life I STILL want to be a pig...quality over quantity)

***
Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour. (Still not over that pig thing)

***
Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(Is that why Flipper is always smiling?)

***
The strongest muscle in the body is tongue. (Hummm...I won't touch THAT one!)

***
The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over on
its right side when intoxicated. (From drinking little bottles of...? Did the govt. pay for this research?)

***
Butterflies taste with their feet. (Ah, geez)

***
An ostrich's eye is bigger than it's brain. (I know some people like that)

***
Starfish don't have brains. (I know some people like that, too)


Im considering of moving to Guam :devil:

User avatar
ThunderTitan
Perpetual Poster
Perpetual Poster
Posts: 23263
Joined: 06 Jan 2006
Location: Now/here
Contact:

Postby ThunderTitan » Feb 14 2006, 20:02

In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.
(I presume this was a big enough problem that they had to pass this law?)


So they take turns? :|
Disclaimer: May contain sarcasm!

I have never faked a sarcasm in my entire life. - ???
"With ABC deleting dynamite gags from cartoons, do you find that your children are using explosives less frequently?" — Mark LoPresti

Alt-0128: €


Image

User avatar
ThunderTitan
Perpetual Poster
Perpetual Poster
Posts: 23263
Joined: 06 Jan 2006
Location: Now/here
Contact:

Postby ThunderTitan » Feb 14 2006, 21:55


Joker pulls boner of the year!!


Image

http://www.superdickery.com/seduction/3.html
Disclaimer: May contain sarcasm!

I have never faked a sarcasm in my entire life. - ???
"With ABC deleting dynamite gags from cartoons, do you find that your children are using explosives less frequently?" — Mark LoPresti

Alt-0128: €


Image

User avatar
DaemianLucifer
Round Table Hero
Round Table Hero
Posts: 11282
Joined: 06 Jan 2006
Location: City 17

Postby DaemianLucifer » Feb 14 2006, 22:30

I remember that one.It was somwhere in the old campfire as well :devil:

User avatar
Caradoc
Round Table Knight
Round Table Knight
Posts: 1780
Joined: 06 Jan 2006
Location: Marble Falls Texas

Postby Caradoc » Feb 15 2006, 7:27

I was just over at superdickery.com and he is still trying to recover from being hacked a couple of weeks ago. No updates since December -- I can hardly stand it. At least there are still StupidComics on misterkitty.org.
Before you criticize someone, first walk a mile in their shoes. If they get mad, you'll be a mile away. And you'll have their shoes.

User avatar
Corribus
Round Table Knight
Round Table Knight
Posts: 4994
Joined: 06 Jan 2006
Location: The Duchy of Xicmox IV

Postby Corribus » Feb 20 2006, 15:10

Back to the "real" news:

'Red Light' District Declares Open House
from: http://apnews.myway.com/article/20060217/D8FR3N8G0.html

AMSTERDAM, Netherlands (AP) - There may be no such thing as a free lunch, but occasionally there's a cheap feast for the eyes.

Several topless bars, peep shows and sex show clubs in Amsterdam's famed "Red Light" prostitution district have declared an open house on Feb. 18, hoping to shore up their reputation with local politicians who are calling for a crackdown.

"You can come in, have a free drink, look around," said Bob de Maan, spokesman for the "Banana Bar," which is known for its live sex shows.

"People think that this is something dirty, but now - it's an open house. They can see for themselves."

Prostitution in Amsterdam boomed during the city's 17th century Golden Age, when prostitutes catered to sailors on shore leave.

With its lingerie-clad women and red neon lights, the area in the city center became a major tourist draw in the 20th century. The Dutch government legalized prostitution in 2000 with an eye to making it easier to tax and regulate.

But problems have continued as the area acts as a magnet for pimps, drug addicts, petty criminals and human traffickers. A recent study found that despite health rules, about 7 percent of Dutch prostitutes have HIV, the virus that causes AIDs.

The open house came in response to proposals by the head of Amsterdam's largest political party meant to discourage women from marketing themselves in windows.

Several of the best-known institutions are opening their doors, in an idea supported by the Prostitution Information Center, the Sex Museum, and the Salvation Army which helps the district's many downtrodden.
"What men are poets who can speak of Jupiter if he were like a man, but if he is an immense spinning sphere of methane and ammonia must be silent?" - Richard P. Feynman

User avatar
Mutare Drake
Scout
Scout
Posts: 178
Joined: 07 Jan 2006

Postby Mutare Drake » Feb 21 2006, 0:42

That's absolutely awful. And they have a Prostitution Information Center?! Sex Museum?!?! Don't people have something better to do with their time?

No wonderful news from my end of the world, at least none I've heard.

User avatar
DaemianLucifer
Round Table Hero
Round Table Hero
Posts: 11282
Joined: 06 Jan 2006
Location: City 17

Postby DaemianLucifer » Feb 21 2006, 1:09

Mutare Drake wrote:That's absolutely awful. And they have a Prostitution Information Center?! Sex Museum?!?! Don't people have something better to do with their time?


Like what?Mugging and beating each other sensless?Or just plain old bullet firing?

User avatar
Corribus
Round Table Knight
Round Table Knight
Posts: 4994
Joined: 06 Jan 2006
Location: The Duchy of Xicmox IV

Postby Corribus » Feb 21 2006, 1:16

Mutare Drake wrote:That's absolutely awful. And they have a Prostitution Information Center?! Sex Museum?!?! Don't people have something better to do with their time?

Actually I was hoping one of our european RT members might be willing to do some on-the-site reporting. :D
"What men are poets who can speak of Jupiter if he were like a man, but if he is an immense spinning sphere of methane and ammonia must be silent?" - Richard P. Feynman

User avatar
DaemianLucifer
Round Table Hero
Round Table Hero
Posts: 11282
Joined: 06 Jan 2006
Location: City 17

Postby DaemianLucifer » Feb 21 2006, 1:34

Ill be glad to do it!Ill do it even without asking for any money except travel expenses! :devil:

User avatar
Mutare Drake
Scout
Scout
Posts: 178
Joined: 07 Jan 2006

Postby Mutare Drake » Feb 21 2006, 2:51

Corribus wrote: Actually I was hoping one of our european RT members might be willing to do some on-the-site reporting. :D

I had a bad feeling that was coming.


Return to “Campfire”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests