Winterfate's RT News Thread

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asandir
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Unread postby asandir » 11 May 2007, 03:25

*cracks the whip*

well, get back to it!
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Unread postby winterfate » 12 May 2007, 00:03

If you insist...;)

You can expect the next one soon...not sure when, but hopefully by the end of this weekend. :D

Don't worry...finals are done next week so the interviews will be back in force very soon...:devil:
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Unread postby asandir » 14 May 2007, 01:15

well praise the lord for that, cause I'm getting thru this sub-forum all too quickly!
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Unread postby winterfate » 15 May 2007, 03:20

My long overdue interview is here!

Pardon the delay, my fellow Round Table comrades. I have been tweaking my Infrared Mind Belief Analyzer or, as I like to call it, IMBA!

IMBA is used to spy on game companies. So, instead of being an interview in the strictest sense, let's have some fun with this thingie and scout out some companies, shall we?

(Stuff I say will be in italics)

Ok, where to start? Ah, yes! Nival!

Nival Entertainment:

Worker: Boss, we can't keep patching Dark Messiah.
Boss: Why not?

Worker: Well...it's about to exceed our MHB limit.
Boss: Ah yes...our Must Have Bug limit, the amount of bugs our game must have...can't defy that...how many are left in the game?

Worker: Well, 3 major ones and about 97 minor ones.
Boss: Ok! Programmers, shut down your computers and let's get some vodka! We can't keep fixing this game, or we'll exceed the MHB limit!

*voices roar in approval*

Ok...that was a tad disturbing. Let's go to Blizzard Entertainment, a personal favorite of mine :D.

Blizzard Entertainment:

Worker: Boss...about that announcement on the 19th...
Boss: What is it?

Worker: Uh...we don't have the cover art for the next WoW expansion ready.
Boss: Darn, let's do plan B then. *calls artist*

Artist: Yes Boss?
Boss: Go over to Nival and steal their expansion art. Our new WoW expansion needs some cover art.

Artist: Sir?
Boss: Do it! They stole our Warcraft 3 plot when they did Heroes 5. Let's return the favor.

Artist: Yes Sir!

Oh boy...what is this world coming to? Ok, one more! How about Flagship Studios? Hellgate: London is looking pretty good.

Flagship Studios:

Worker: Boss...don't you think we're charging too much for the monthly subscription?
Boss: Nonsense! Blizzard is charging $15 per month for WoW games and we have an offline component in our game.

Worker: Ok.
Boss: Yeah, don't worry about it! We're going to drive our old employers out of business with this game. *laughs evilly*

Oooooook....enough of that!

So, I hope you've liked my special edition of my news thread. I'll have other things prepared soon (I hope ;)).

Until the next time this is winterfate signing out!

Take care and may all your rolls be lucky! ;)
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Unread postby asandir » 15 May 2007, 05:51

nice winter, though a tad short, but I can most graciously forgive that :D
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Unread postby Mytical » 15 May 2007, 06:16

Anchor : Welcome back to our special two part series on the kidnapping of Mytical. We are on the line again with her kidnappers.

Anchor: What are your demands?
Voice : Demands? We demand you take this crazy woman from us, as far away as possible. Forget all the other demands..she is ...how do you say..a handful!
Anchor : I don't know...things are awful quiet around here without her...
Voice: Ok we through in 100 million rubles and 10 cases of vodka!
Anchor : wow, that bad is she? I had no idea.
Voice : Da..I mean yes, she is a nightmare. So far she has killed 5 of my guards, drank 100 cases of our best vodka, and driven 3 more guards insane!
Anchor : ok, we will take her off your hands, but first the money and the vodka. Oh and throw in contract stating our station can interview anybody from Nival or Ubi at any time.
Voice : But we do not work...
Anchor : Then you can keep her.
Voice : Ok! OK! you have a deal. Please just take her..we will send you her now..keep her!
Anchor : Thought you'd see it my way. She had best been unharmed..
Voice : Unharmed?! She is a mad woman..she harmed us, not the other way around!
Anchor : Well we will be waiting on her. Don't forget all the rest or we will send her straight back.
Voice : Anything..just keep her away.
*A little later*
Anchor : Welcome back Mytical.
Mytical : Ah nice to be back, though I will miss their vodka..that was some good stuff.
Anchor : So any plans on continuing the story?
Mytical : Hmm well somebody closed down the presses (the thread) but I will see what I can do.
Anchor : Are you going to retire from interviewing.
Mytical : Taking a long break, but may be back. When I get more interesting interviews in mind.
Anchor : So..why is it they think you are some sort of demon or something?
Mytical : *shrugs* kill a couple of guards, drive a couple more insane, and they think you are lucifer...go figure. I warned them not to touch me..*grins evilly*
Anchor : Rumor has it that you have an announcement, but have not made it yet.
Mytical : May not either. Still debating. Well gotta go, going to track down a bit more vodka.
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Unread postby asandir » 15 May 2007, 07:11

nicely done .... but now you got me interested in this announcement! :D
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Unread postby Mytical » 16 May 2007, 08:55

Ok the choice was to put this very short interview in Joke thread or here. Decided to do it here. This is a quasi-joke, thought it would be humorous.

Anchor : Well Mytical and Winter have the night off, so as a filler we have brought in a zombie. We don't know which movie, game, or whatever this one is from, but should be a fairly short interview. First question : What do zombies look for in a mate?

Zombie : Bbbbrrraaaaiiinnnsss.

Anchor : uh huh. Second question, what is something that rhymes with trains?

Zombie : Bbbbrrraaaaiiinnnsss

Anchor : O...k what is your favorite part of the human anatomy?

Zombie : Bbbbrrraaaiiinnnsss

Anchor : And I guess if I asked you what you liked to eat, you would just say brains again?

Zombie : Actually I am quite partial to fried rice.

Well there you have it. Very short, kinda lame, but there it is :)
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Unread postby winterfate » 17 May 2007, 00:01

That's why we can't leave the anchor hosting when we're off, right Mytical? ;)

:rofl:

The joke is kinda funny...you WOULD expect the zombie to say brains again. :)
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Unread postby asandir » 17 May 2007, 00:41

I was gonna go with kind of lame really, but amusingly so :)
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Unread postby winterfate » 23 May 2007, 00:54

This is winterfate signing in for another interview. Today we will be interviewing the alternate Sylvan upgrades to see how they feel about becoming a part of the Sylvan faction.

I reach Syris Thalla at dawn.

winterfate: Hello!
Dryad: Hi, there! What brings you to our lovely capitol?

winterfate: If I said you, would you kiss me?
Dryad: No...nice try though...:tongue:

winterfate: Haha. So, how does it feel to be a part of the Sylvan faction?
Dryad: Pretty good actually...I get to frolick around in these trees all day long and life's good.

winterfate: Don't you worry about enemy attacks?
Dryad: Nah...that's what the higher tier units are here for.

winterfate: Ok...where are the Bladesingers?
Dryad: Singing.

winterfate: Singing? Where?
Dryad: Over there *points to her right*.

winterfate: Ok, see ya around!
Dryad: Take care. ;)

I go to the town plaza, where the Bladesingers are performing.

winterfate: Hello Bladesingers!
Bladesinger: Hush! We are performing...

winterfate: It seems like you're humming Findan's latest catastrophe...that's not a performance.
Bladesinger: You insolent little...

Jenova arrives at the scene.

Jenova: Now, now. Calm down, Bladesinger. And you, winter, stop provoking our new members.
winterfate: All right...I was going to ask them...

Jenova: About how it feels to be a part of our faction? Look at them...you need not ask...

The Bladesingers are clearly enjoying themselves.

winterfate: Next...um...where are the Sharpshooters?
Jenova: This way...

Jenova leads me to an archery range, where several sharpshooters are practicing their aim.

winterfate: Hi Sharpshooters!
Sharpshooter: Hello winterfate!

winterfate: How do you know my name?
Sharpshooter: Well, I was one of the few Erathian survivors, so that's how I know who you are. You saved Lady Jenova from the clutches of the Necromancers...I am glad.

winterfate: As am I. So, how does it feel to be a part of this faction?
Sharpshooter: Pretty good, but I wish Nival had given us a second attack.

winterfate: That would make you IMBA.
Sharpshooter: Maybe, but it would've been cool.

winterfate: So true. I'm off to keep asking the other new members about how they feel.
Sharpshooter: Ok, take care winter!
Jenova: Those would be the High Druids. This way.

Jenova leads me to a Grove where several Druids are praying to the earth. Among them is a High Druid.

winterfate: Hello High Druid!
High Druid: Hello young one...you seek to know what I think about being a part of this faction?

winterfate: Yes.
High Druid: It is an honor, and a good excuse to leave my hermetic existence up in the mountains.

winterfate: I see...
High Druid: I can't shapeshift though...I feel cheated.

winterfate: Um...
High Druid: Can you believe the nerve? Me, High Druid among druids, and I can't shapeshift...

winterfate: This isn't AD&D you know!
High Druid: Are you sure? Look closely...Rangers favoring enemies...skill progression...stat points...it's all a conspiracy I tell you!

winterfate: I'll be leaving now...
High Druid: Yes, and on your way out, pay the 100 gold fee for entry.

winterfate: The what?!
Jenova: Never mind him...he's just a bit on the crazy side.

winterfate: I can tell...on to the White Unicorns...
Jenova: Right behind you.

I turn around and sure enough there is a White Unicorn behind me.

winterfate: Oh, hi there! Augh, I'm blind! Can't see!
White Unicorn: *snorts*
Jenova: Here. Have some sunglasses...Nival went a bit overboard with the white, didn't they?

winterfate: I'll say! Unicorn, can you talk?
White Unicorn: *nods negatively*

winterfate: Hmm...so how does it feel to be a part of this faction?
White Unicorn: *snorts proudly*

winterfate: That's good. *I rub the Unicorn's neck*
Jenova: You want to go see the last two units right?

winterfate: Yes, where to?
Jenova: Our prison for the treants.

winterfate: Prison?!
Jenova: Of course...you didn't think I was going to leave them out in the
open did you? They are dangerous.

Jenova leads me down into the Syris Thalla Prisons, where several Anger Treants are being held...for the protection of all Sylvanites.

Upon seeing me, one of the Anger Treants breaks down the bars.

winterfate: Hello there...
Anger Treant: Must...crush...puny...weakling.

winterfate: Huh?
Anger Treant: *swings at me*

winterfate: Now hold on...
Anger Treant: *swings again*

winterfate: That's it! *casts Ice Bolt, freezing the Anger Treant*
Anger Treant: Ow....

winterfate: Well, it's your fault. Why do you want to crush me?
Anger Treant: Because I'm angry.

winterfate: And why are you angry?
Anger Treant: I don't know...

winterfate: Huh?
Anger Treant: I don't know...it had something to do with Nival creating me and calling me angry I think.

winterfate: Ok...so how does it feel to be part of the Sylvan faction?
Anger Treant: Pretty good, when I'm not angry.

winterfate: And that is when?
Anger Treant: Once every 3 hours and 10 minutes.

winterfate: So exact...
Anger Treants: Yes...*enters rage*...must...crush...puny...weakling!

winterfate: Run!!!

I escape the prisons find the Rainbow Dragons, in their solitude.

winterfate: Hello Rainbow Dragons!
Rainbow Dragon: Hello my darling...

winterfate: Um...you're male...why are you calling me darling?
Rainbow Dragon: Cause I absolutely adore you...

winterfate: Ok...you're making me uncomfortable...
Rainbow Dragon: You can come cuddle with...

winterfate: Enough! I just want to know how you feel being part of the Sylvan faction.
Rainbow Dragon: Fabulous!

winterfate: Ok..I'll be leaving now...
Rainbow Dragon: Wait my honey...don't go. We have many things to converse about...

winterfate: Leave Jenova a letter...she'll know how to get it to me...

I narrowly escape the...clutches of the Rainbow Dragons.

Well I hope you enjoyed this interview...
This is winterfate signing out for now.

Take care and may all your rolls be lucky! ;)
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Unread postby asandir » 25 May 2007, 07:13

nicely done winter, though ya shoulda thrown something in about the darling rainbow dragons fab colours, which, aren't rainbow like at all
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Unread postby winterfate » 25 May 2007, 23:42

Thanks stefan...but I didn't want to be too close to that Rainbow Dragon...:D

This is winterfate signing in. By popular demand, I will now do the alternate Dungeon upgrades. Let's go to Ygg'Chall, the capitol of the Dark Elves and see what they think.

I reach Ygg'Chall at...um...uh...heck, I'm underground, how should I know what time it is?

winterfate: Where is everybody?

I start to walk and notice I can't move and that I'm touching something invisible.

winterfate: Who's there?
Stalkers: We, the Stalkers!

winterfate: Oh, for a second there I thought you were Harry Potter.
Stalkers: Meh, we made his Cloak of Invisibility.

winterfate: Nice! So, how do you guys feel about being part of the Dungeon faction?

Their leader steps up to answer that question.

Stalker Leader: Well, it is an honor, even though Raelag is never here...
winterfate: Why is that?

Stalker Leader: He's with his beloved...*sighs*...why does he get to frolick around...acts like such a pixie...
winterfate: Ok....where are the Blood Witches?

Stalker Leader: *points to his left* Right over there, training...they're always training...they should take some time off to...
winterfate: Why don't you go ask them then?

Stalker Leader: Ask them what?
winterfate: You know...in any case, see you around.

Stalker Leader: Ok...

winterfate: Blood Witches!!
Blood Witch: Yes? Can't you see we're busy?

winterfate: Yes, I just wanted to ask you how you feel about being a part of the Dungeon faction.
Blood Witch: This is boring!! I wish I was still part of the Soulscar Clan...

winterfate: Huh? If Raelag were to...
Blood Witch: ...find out he wouldn't care...he's too involved with his beloved...

winterfate: I notice that you guys don't like Isabel too much.
Blood Witch: She's an idiot.

winterfate: Haha. Ok... where are the Minotaur Captains?
Blood Witch: Over at those caverns over there. *points to her right*
Be careful, there have reports of demonic forces in the area.

winterfate: Ok, thanks for the warning!

I go to the caverns and find some Minotaur Captains fighting some Horned Overseers.

winterfate: Hello!
Minotaur Captain: Hold the line men! I'll be back!

The Minotaur Captain runs over to me.

winterfate: Hi!
Minotaur Captain: Hello. We are in the middle of something, if you don't mind...

winterfate: Can I help?
Minotaur Captain: You?

winterfate: *smirk* *casts Circle of Winter* *Horned Overseer dying sounds*
Minotaur Captain: Impressive, young one.

winterfate: Thank you! Now, how does it feel to be a part of the Dungeon faction?
Minotaur Captain: Glorious! All the fighting we could ever desire and vacation time as well...

winterfate: Sweet! So, where are the Dragons?
Minotaur Captain: Shouldn't you go in order?

winterfate: Nonsense! I feel bold. Lemme go to...
Minotaur Captain: *holds me back* It's my Aura of Bravery. You should really go in order...

winterfate: Phooey...very well. To the Black Riders!
Minotaur Captain: Exactly! There's one right behind you.

winterfate: So there is! Hello Black Rider.
Black Rider: Good day, young one. So you want to know how I feel being a part of this faction right?

winterfate: Exactly!
Black Rider: Well, it's not bad, but the Boss is never here...

winterfate: Raelag?
Black Rider: Exactly. Always out...

winterfate: I know, I know...with Isabel right?
Black Rider: *nods*

winterfate: I see...so where are the Acidic Hydras?
Black Rider: Near the Acid Pools...

winterfate: Typical...I'll be going there then.
Black Rider: Hop on!

winterfate: Ok...

The trip takes about 5 minutes, with the Black Rider's lizard biting all units it passed by. By the time we arrive at the Pools, we have a legion of various mad Dungeon troops behind us.

winterfate: Ride By Attack?
Black Rider: *sighs* Yes...I'll take care of the masses. Go talk to the Hydras.

winterfate: Ok! Hello, Acidic Hydras!
Acidic Hydra: *growls in greeting, spitting acid that lands near my feet*

winterfate: Careful! You can't talk can you?
Acidic Hydra: *nods negatively, causing a wave of acid to splatter across the barren fields*

winterfate: So, how does it feel to be a part of the Dungeon faction?
Acidic Hydra: *roars proudly*

winterfate: Ok...time to go see...
Shadow Mistress: The Shadow Mistresses?

winterfate: Exactly. Wait...who said that?
Shadow Mistress: A Shadow Mistress...

winterfate: Haha. Ok, so how does it feel to be part of the Dungeon faction?
Shadow Mistress: The Matriarchs have taken it easy and forced us to become the enforcers of the law...how do you think it feels?

winterfate: Terrible?
Shadow Mistress: It feels great! Such power. I can whip whoever I want, whenever I want *readies her whip*.

winterfate: Wait! Don't get any smart ideas...
Shadow Mistress: One little whipping, please?

winterfate: NO!! Now, where are the Red Dragons?
Shadow Mistress: Over at those cliffs. Do you need a Teleport to get there quicker?

winterfate: I'll be fine.
Shadow Mistress: As you wish...

I climb the cliffs, a feat that takes up several hours.
I reach the summit, exhausted.

winterfate: Huff...puff...
Red Dragon: Who goes there?

winterfate: Me! I've come to ask you how it feels to be a part of the Dungeon Faction.
Red Dragon: Spiffy. This armor they gave me is spiffy. Everything is spiffy.

winterfate: Spiffy?
Red Dragon: Of course mortal. I look really hot now.

winterfate: Ok....
Red Dragon: I got the shiny armor, I'm the uber pwner...

winterfate: This is a bit much...why can't any of you alternate dragons be..serious?
Red Dragon: Nival's trying to balance out the levels of seriousness and humor present in the game.

winterfate: A task they are failing at...
Red Dragon: Nonsense. Have you seen those boring Black Dragons? They have no style. We, the Red Dragons have the best style. Armored Power FTW!!!

winterfate: I'll be leaving now...

I descend the cliffs, which takes up several more hours of my time...and then leave the city with all haste.

Seriously, those dragons are freaking me out...:S

Until the next upgrades, this is winterfate signing out!

Take care and may all your rolls be lucky!
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Unread postby Elvin » 25 May 2007, 23:51

Uber pwner XD Not bad winter! You really hate isabel that much? :D
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Unread postby winterfate » 25 May 2007, 23:53

:rofl:

Nah! I don't really hate her...but she's like the dumbest character I've seen in a while. Every thing she does is flawed in some way...
Why can't she be more like...um...anyone else? :D

Btw, did you read the previous interview? (the Sylvan alt. upgrades)
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Unread postby Elvin » 26 May 2007, 00:34

Yeah, I could swear that most comments around suggest something about the nature of the rainbow dragons ;)
And I totally agree about Isabel. Unbelievably naive and moronic though she gets better during HoF. What's wrong with Raelag?
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Unread postby winterfate » 26 May 2007, 00:39

Elvin wrote:What's wrong with Raelag?
He's never home! ;)
Seriously, it is very un-leaderlike to go out and spend ridiculous amounts of time doing something else and letting your country sink like a leaky ship. :D

At least he's cooler than Isabel...:devious:
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Unread postby Elvin » 26 May 2007, 01:00

I was referring to his being with isabel :ill: I don't mind about him not being around as he had given up anyway, it was all a part of the plan to save her. He was my favourite character for the original H5 but the fact that he is in love with Isabel makes me wanna puke. At least we'll see Zehir in TotE, he's an interesting individual.
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Unread postby winterfate » 26 May 2007, 04:12

Oh yeah...that too! :)
I don't understand what Raelag saw in her...

Zehir is rather interesting (and has a brain to match...something Isabel would do well to take notes on :devil:). :D
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Unread postby asandir » 28 May 2007, 01:13

nicely done again .... and I agree about nival failing at the humour thing
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